GD Garner

This would be part of the reason I don't like Jennifer Garner and I don't want to be her friend. You know 'cause she's just dying to be mine.

Here's what director Kevin Smith had to say about his Catch & Release costar:

“Jennifer does not share the same sense of humour as me — she did not like
my jokes. I was picking on Ben Affleck and making fun of him because I’ve known
him for a really long time and Jennifer goes, ‘You know, if you keep saying
stuff about him, I’m going to kick you’re ass.’ And she could, I’ve seen Alias.
She has a real girly sense of humour and didn’t understand that I was
kidding.”

I don't think Jennifer Garner would get any joke that doesn't start with knock knock.

Lighten up, take the non toxic, organic stick out of your ass Jennifer, have some fun that doesn't involve paper mache.









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JEnnifer Garner Has A Stalker

There's a man out there named Steven Burky who loves Jennifer Garner and her mom jeans.

Apparently Burky has been stalking Jennifer since 2002. Click here to see some letters he has wrote her over the years, he's whacked.

Jennifer has found it necessary to have a restraining order put against the man that prohibits him from coming near her, Ben, Violet, the nanny and Jennifer's assistant. Jen states in court documents,

"I now fear not only for my personal safety, but also for the safety and well-being of those that I love and care about most, including my husband and daughter. Also, I am currently pregnant and fear for the safety of my second child once born."

All this guy has to do to see her is park his ass at the Farmer's Market, she like lives there.

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Jennifer Garner Actually Looks Nice

Jennifer Garner left David Letterman's joint looking like she had a run in with The Sham Wow dude.

I'm sure some reporter will get the breaking news of what happened to her arm and knee. I swear to god it wasn't me...I swear to god I didn't push her down the stairs last Monday at 9pm...



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Jennifer Garner's Closet: where style goes to die

Jennifer Garner takes Violet to school.

Nice pants.

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Jennifer Garner...guess where

Jennifer Garner at the Farmer's Market in these ridiculous clothes, she's such a waste of a rich person.

Nothing new here except the fact the she's really popped in the last week or so.

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The Mom's View

Jennifer Garner is producing a show that will be like The View but geared towards moms, hosted by Lauren Sanchez-Whitesell of "So You Think You Can Dance".

"It's really [Jennifer's] show and I'm the host," Sanchez-Whitesell, 37, said at a luncheon for iVillage Cares and the Children's Defense Fund in Beverly Hills.

"We're putting together a show for moms, by moms," said Sanchez-Whitesell, whose husband, agent Patrick Whitesell, represents Garner's husband, Ben Affleck.

"We're pitching it next week to a network. I call Jen the Barbara Walters of the show. She will come on periodically. We haven't quite settled exactly [how often], but she's the executive producer."

We have a show like this based in Toronto creatively called "The Mom Show" and even though I'm not a mother I tune in from time to time.

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JEnnifer Addresses The Bump

Jennifer Garner was at Baby Einstein's 10th anniversary celebration (imagine that) when she sat down to talk to Access Hollywood. Reporter Tony Potts came right out with it.

“Congratulations. Can I say that?” Tony asked.
“For what?” Jennifer smiled.
“For baby number two,” Tony responded.
“Oh I’m not pregnant,” she giggled. “I just had a lot of carbs for breakfast. It’s just — what do they call it? A breakfast pouch? Bunch?”
“It always makes me laugh when people say ‘Is she?’ ‘Isn’t she?’ It’s
like eventually you will know, so just chill out for a minute,”
"We're so excited obviously,"

Not exactly breaking news considering she's already showing.


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Jennifer Garner is making me proud but still making me angry. First off she's at the Farmers Market, that's enough to make me wanna slap her but then I looked at her outfit and ...wait a minute? She actually looks fashionable.

Wow. Clap, clap, clap.

Soon we'll be back to the regular Garner , don't get your hopes up.

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Garner Guards

Jennifer Garner used Violet as a shield for the belly but once at the park you can clearly see the bump action.

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80th Oscars Arrival

Jennifer Garner

Jennifer Hudson

Jessica Alba

JOHNNY! and his wife Vanessa Paradis

Diane Lane and Josh Brolin

Twinkle Toes and Kelly Preston

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Graduation Time

What happened at your graduation? A bouquet of flowers, a pep talk from the geekiest guy in school then dinner at The Keg? Seems about right, no?

Not for some kids in Fairfax, Virginia! The Grads of Falls Church High School 2007 were treated to a speech by alum, Ben Affleck. He's seen here leaving the ceremony with wife Jennifer Garner.

Moral of Ben's speech...never date Jennifer Lopez...she's bad for the career.

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Reese Witherspoon picking up some books/age appropriate magazines and shopping at Whole Foods, her and Jennifer Garner should really get together and exchange recipes for Granola Cake with Sugar Free Icing.

No, I prefer Reese over Jennifer and assume she's less yuppie but it could be worse, they could parent like Britney or Alec Baldwin so I shouldn't make fun.





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Jen and Violet

Jennifer Garner seems to be the biggest "GRANOLA PARENT" in the world. I think she irons her socks...that type. There's Britney and then all the way on the other side of the spectrum there's Jennifer.


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What a Mother Should Be

Jennifer Garner with daughter Violet at the park. All together now, AWWWWW.

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I Don't See It

Rumors are swirling that Jennifer Garner is pregnant with her second child. I can't tell. Looks like a normal stomach to me.

What do you think?



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Expecting Something?

People ask me why I have a dislike or Jennifer Garner and these pants just about sum it up.

And she's probably coming from the library or the farmer's market or something, with a truck full of granola and sugarless snacks. I promise it makes sense in my head.

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The Affleck's Do Vancouver

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner were out and about in nippy Vancouver. They look like such a normal family. So far from the spectacle that was BENNIFER the first.



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HA! YOU SUCK!

Katherine Heigl thinks a little too highly of herself and it costed her a job.

Producers were looking at her for an Ensemble Movie called Valentines Day that due out in February of 2011.

During the talks Katherine (her people) came back demanding $3 million for the role. They basically laughed at her ass and moved down the casting list.

Since it's an ensemble piece there's no lead so the number was too high for her to do 3-14 days work.

The actors already attached to the film are Julia Roberts, Jennifer Garner, Anne Hathaway, Ashton Kutcher, Shirley MacLaine and Bradley Cooper.

She will not be missed.

For the record her rep denies this story

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I gotta give credit where credit is due, usually Jennifer Garner looks like the subject on What Not To Wear but on the set of her new film My Valentine she looked great.

Make it translate. A good blow out can last you 3 days honey.

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Still Knocked Up

Jennifer Garner and Violet.

Probably on their way to make organic macaroni art or something.

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