8 Babies = Suicide Watch

This is kinda old news but a woman in California has gave birth to eight babies, six boys and two girls ranging in weight from 1 lb., 8 oz. to 3 lbs., 4 oz.

She's the second woman on record to birth octuplets and have all of them live. They thought she was carrying 7 and then at the last minute in the delivery room another one was there, yep, they just found another human chilling in her uterus. Nice.

She's still unidentified because she's aware of the media shitestorm that awaits her once her name is released but People Magazine has introduced us to her medical team.

"It takes a village to deliver octuplets – 52 medical professionals, to
be exact, who prepared for every possible complication, and who still got a
last-minute surprise. "It was a well choreographed baby dance in there, as one
infant after another was lifted up and handed on in one long, smooth pattern,"
Socorro Serrano, a spokeswoman for Kaiser Permanente, tells PEOPLE...

During the seven weeks that the mystery mom was in the hospital in
Bellflower, Calif., the medical staff did two drills, with separate teams of
doctors and nurses practicing delivering and handling each baby as it was born."

If you think this is madness then you should also know that's she's planning on breastfeeding all eight of the kids. If she plans to sleep at all for the next couple of months I would suggest ditching the breastfeeding and start offering sexual favors to the stock boys at her local pharmacy for some free formula.

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