This Is The Time We All Need Jesus

Heidi Montag is going to put out a Christian Album. Heidi says "I have been the most religious person since I was 2 years old. I always felt this crazy connection to God." Him for you, not so much.

If there is a God out there and he loves me he will help me in my fight to stop this album from reaching the public.

Apart from having a "crazy connection" with God Heidi also feels his pain. In response to the Lauren Sex tape rumors...

"God knows the truth in all of this, and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters. Jesus was persecuted, and I'm going to get persecuted, ya know?"

Her struggle is so much like that of Jesus though...like, ya know?.

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A la Carte

Courtney Love in a Shopping Cart...we all knew it was coming. Soon she'll be pushing it trying to sell you bottle caps.

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Cute Overload

I like animals, especially puppies and kittens, but I don't care much for animals once they are out of the baby stage. I don't dress my animals up (except one incident with a liquor bottle Santa suit and my cat), or buy them presents...food is present enough in my books.

All this being said Pete Wentz's new dog Rigby sends me into my ridiculous dog voice. I have always wanted an American Bull Dog because they look really stupid and I like stupid in my animals, it's funny.



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Lindsay's Bump

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson hold hands on the set of Labour Pains.

And below Lindsay seems to be getting attached to the fake bump she rocks in the movie.

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Pamela Anderson Slams Jessica Simpson

Jessica Simpson's t-shirt that proudly proclaimed "Real Girls Eat Meat" has caused notorious vegetarian and animal rights activist Pamela Anderson to get a little nasty.

When asked about the shirt on an Australian Radio show Pam responded "I think she is a bitch and whore. Actually, I don't know if she was talking about food or men."

Um, a bit harsh no? Pammie totally took this to another level. Jessica Simpson is on my all time hatred list but partaking in the odd steak here and there doesn't make you a whore, and above all that should Pamela Anderson really be calling anyone a whore?

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Total Tosh

Guy Richie's mum Lady Amber Leighton is speaking up about the rumors that Madonna and Guy Richie are headed for Divorce Court.

"There’s no conversation about divorce because there is no divorce.
They are no different to most other couples and we all know that being together
can be hard sometimes and marriages are not always a bed of roses. I’ll say it
one more time, they are not getting divorced; the speculation is TT – that’s
total tosh."

Tosh is so my new word. Expect to hear it daily.

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Burn This Shirt

Eva Longoria went out to lunch at Toast in the heart of LA wearing a I WANT MORE PRIVACY t-shirt.

First of all Heidi has this T-shirt so she may as well just chuck that bad boy right in the bin. Second of all, why don't you make yourself up a nice Tuna Salad On Rye from your own kitchen if you require privacy. Last time I check there was paparazzi in Los Angeles Darlin'.

Spencer Proves He's An Even Bigger Ass Than You thought

Mary Kate Olsen was on Letterman promoting her new film "The Wackness" when he asked her about young Hollywood and what they could do to shape up, her response was "wear underwear".

You could tell she was uncomfortable and didn't want to talk bad about anyone but he kept pressing her and then Spencer Pratt was brought up. Letterman said he was "wormy", MK then revealed that she went to high school with him and he was a bad sport.

Click here to watch the interview...the Spencer talk is about 5:15 in.

Well when the publicity whore himself found out about this he decided to release a statement...

"I don't really get why she'd use my name to get press for her little indie
film that no one's going to see. She should probably focus more on not getting
dressed in the dark than on me. I know I've made it in Hollywood when a famous
troll is talking about me on Letterman. I forgive her, though. She's had to go
through life as the less cute twin, which must be tough."

How in his deluded mind does he think Mary Kate Olsen needs to use him for publicity? She ducks behind telephone poles in an attempt to hide from the paparazzi but all of a sudden she's going to try to cash in on the Hills in order to get written up in Us Weekly.

Yeah and Heidi has a promising music career ahead of her ....

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A Very Winehouse Weekend

Amy Winehouse actually showed up to Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday tribute in London's Hyde Park. She played two songs and managed to get through the whole set without a hit. A job well done for Amy.

All was not sweet for Winehouse this weekend though, while performing at the Glastonbury Festival in Somerset, England Amy climbed off the stage and threw a punch at a fan. No one knows why, some say the fan tried to grab her, I say she thought the fan was a Gypsy trying to steal her lucky charms and her soul...crackheads are like that.

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Guess Who

IT'S JENNIFER ANISTON!!

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Who was snapping shots at a concert?

Halle Berry steps out, yeah she looks great, like she never had a kid, blah blah blah...WHERE THE HELL IS NAHLA?

It's been 72 days since her birth and there's yet to be a glimpse of the youngin's face.

When Tom and Katie did this there were rumors that Suri was an alien with two heads, pretty much every rumor imaginable was swirling around the rags.

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Sur Britney Spears

Britney headed out to celebrate at LA Restaurant Sur after the news that she was awarded overnight visits with her boys.

Hopefully eating was the only thing happening and Brit's not going to revert into her vagina flashing hot ass mess ways.

Also rumor has it that Brit will be performing at the 2008 MTV Awards this September. A comeback from the last failed comeback. We all remember the train wreck that was Britney's 2007 MTV Awards...a look back just for kicks.

Fingers crossed she gets it right this time.



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Why Can't They Get Along?

Britney and Kevin spent a full day with a mediator trying to come up with a custody agreement that suited them both but were unable to agree. Their trial date set for August will proceed.

"It's very likely both Britney and Kevin will testify in a trial," says
L.A. family lawyer Lynn Soodik, who's not involved with the case. "Britney has
to show the court that she's improved as a mother. If she loses, the
gut-wrenching part is that she could miss out on a significant portion of her
kids' childhoods.

"However, since she's under conservatorship, it's unlikely she'll win
any legal custody," Soodik adds. "If she can't make decisions for herself, how
can she decide things like which doctors, schools and religion, if any, are best
for the kids?"

She should have taken anything she could get because I don't think she can undo the damage she's caused in just a month and a half. Kevin's lawyer is going to rip her to shreds on the stand.

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Bringing Back Visuals

Vern Troyer has filled a $20 million dollar lawsuit against TMZ for leaking a clip from his sex tape which he claims was stolen from his home.

"In the suit, filed Thursday in U.S. District Court in downtown L.A.,
Troyer claims TMZ violated his privacy rights and infringed on his copyright and
trademark by running portions of the tape on TMZ TV and TMZ.com. He also alleges TMZ violated his right of publicity and misappropriated his name and
likeness."

The girl above is Ranae Shrider the other star of the tape. 22 year old Ranae is from Kentucky and aspiring to be a model.

I also believe she has a warrant out for her arrest for multiple sexual assaults in The Merry Ole Land Of Oz.

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SUED

A flight attendant has filled a $5 Million Dollar lawsuit against Jennifer Lopez. She claims she was working a flight Jennifer was on and was bit by J Lo's guard dog.

Just after the attack she tried to run away but fell and twisted her back, she had to have surgery and can no longer work.

I would take a bite for 5 mil.

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Spliting?

Rumors about Madonna's divorce have become the same rumors of Nicole Kidman being pregnant, they were always there but nothing ever seemed to come of them.

Well Nicole got pregnant so maybe it's not unheard of that Madge's rumors of Splitsville will become fact as well.

Madonna has reportedly hired Paul McCartney's divorce lawyer Fiona Shackleton. She is the woman who got Paul out of paying the 80 million pounds Heather Mills was asking for in her divorce. In the end he only shelled out 24.3 Million....I know, only, can you believe it?

And according to The Sun Guy Richie has quit Kabbalah. So I assume Madonna will leave him anyways being as she's to Kabbalah what Tom Cruise is to Scientology (minus the crazies).

Only time will tell but for now her rep says "no comment".

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Misery Loves Company

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel take a stroll with Jessica's dog.

Miserable.

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So Natural

Paris Hilton reveals her freshly sprayed (hosed more like it ) tan.

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Love Thy Self

Is anyone else surprised that Jennifer Lopez's kids initials spell out ME?

I bet this necklace was in mind when she picked the names. I know my kids names are going to spell out SUPERSTAR and I'm so getting a necklace...

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Rolling Winehouse

Above we have Amy Winehouse hitting the shop for the essentials, travel size alcohol, tinfoil, spoons, you know just to get her through the week until she does her big shop.

CLAIRE HOFFMAN of Rolling Stone was invited into Winehouse's home and interviewed the tragic star. Click here to read the happenings of Winehouse's layer.

It's sad and disturbing, even if you don't follow her I would suggest reading.

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Still Preggers

Angelina Jolie was photographed for the first time since the fake birth headlines.

So she's still knocked up, still in France, and still chillin' in her villa the size of an African Village.

Her and Brad are making headlines today after their $1 Million Dollar donation to help Iraqi kids affected by war.

"The Jolie-Pitt Foundation has given 500,000 dollars to three groups in
the war-torn country which will provide aid for some 5,700 children, said the
Education Partnership for Children of Conflict, which is co-chaired by
Jolie.

The other 500,000 dollars will go to the U.S.' Armed Services YMCA
Operation Hero Program, which provides tutoring and counseling for children who have a parent stationed overseas or have lost a parent in the fighting."

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Paris Is A Bad Influence

Why must those Madden Boys feed the fire.

Benji Madden's head has been added to short list of objects that can be seen from space.

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Not For The Squeemish

Vern Troyer aka Mimi Me has a sex tape and TMZ offered up this screen cap.

I'm sorry I can't go on with the details...it's just wrong.

Use your friend Google if you are interested.

I'm off to shower.

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Reduction

Christina Aguilera's breasts are massive!

I believe she now has to shop for her bra's at the hardware store, in the duct tape department.

Christina's currently pimping the Rock The Vote campaign and encouraging her fellow Americans to vote in the upcoming election. She even goes as far as to use her son Max in an Ad for the cause, she's cradling him and he's wrapped in the American Flag.

Click here to see her on Larry King Live last night.

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Love Me A Sale

Kirsten Dunst was spotted doing some discount shopping.

I love this because I truly believe that if I was a millionaire I would still get heart palpitations when I seen a marked down item. It's a disease.

Tim McGraw Doesn't Need Security

Tim McGraw was giving a concert in Auburn, Wash. when he spotted a drunk concert goer in the first row hit a woman. He called for security calmly saying over the mic "Get this guy out of here, Security. Security." but when they didn't come he reached down and grabbed the dude and pulled him onstage. Security then came and escorted the man out.

Tim quickly resumed his song "Indian Outlaw".

Click here to view the video, it's pretty bad ass.

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Eat

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony show off their post baby bodies.

Jennifer looks fabulous for someone who just popped out twins, for someone in general for that matter, Marc on the other hand needs to get himself to the nearest McDonald's for a #1 Super sized.

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Change It Back NOW!

Matt Damon on the set of his new film The Informer.

Bring Departed Matty back. ASAP.

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Memba When?

Brook Hogan is responding to the storm that erupted after her father was seen putting sunscreen on her ass poolside.

"I know I'm a grown woman, but it's like he's touching an old car. He used to change my diaper!"

Stop talking. I'm ill.

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Sabrina and Baby

Melissa Joan Hart was at the beach with her family this week. Her new kid Braydon is cute as hell.

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New Digs

Check out Kelly Clarkson's new home in Nashville, she recently purchased the property for $1.5 million.

Although it's gorgeous it's modest for a celebrity, just like Kelly I guess.





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Madden Richie Palooza

Nicole and Joel keep it cute on a family outing.







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